The alchemists say that nigredo lasts forty days. Forty days has a symbolic value. Jesus fasted for forty days in the desert. There are forty days of fasting between Easter and Ascension Day. The Israelites wandered for forty days in the desert. Saint Antonius spent forty years in the Sahara desert, being plagued by visions of extreme erotic scenes and devils.

Psychologically, nigredo is a process of directing oneself to find self-knowledge. A problem is given full attention and reduced to its core. This is not done so much in an intellectual way, but especially by feeling the emotions. By really going into to it, one causes putrefaction, the decomposition of that in which one had been stuck. The confrontation with the inner reality is often painful, and can lead to depression. But once in the depth of the darkness, with the discovery of the seed of the problem, the seed in the ‘prima materia’, the white light is born (=albedo, whiteness, the next phase). A state of rest arises. Insight into the problem has been gained, it has been worked out emotionally, and knowledge arises on how to handle it in a more positive way and to build a more pure attitude.

http://www.soul-guidance.com/houseofthesun/alchemy%202.htm

Day 5: Tolerantia

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.—Corinthians 13:7.

Day 3: A Summoning

Symbols/Omens: Butterflies/Flies

Likes/Dislikes

“Butterflies are angels way of letting us know that they are watching over us”—-from Jungian lecture by Mark Hederman called: Opalescent Wings”

Body:

Mysore Yoga Practice

Walking around the Alps

Extreme pinch nerve on the right side of my neck. A wonderful woman with Scorpio rising from Asheville, NC gave me an impromptu shoulder massage at dinner that totally cured it in 10 minutes.

Too much bread, cheese and heavy sauces on this Swiss diet. My body is like WTF…

I am going to fast on green tea, nuts and fruit tomorrow.

Confession: I am not living up to my potential. Way too many unfinished projects and books that should have been completed years ago. Most of it is due to poor time management and lack of focus.

Gratitude/Inspiration: This Jungian Odyssey. Beautiful setting. Ann Ulanov’s lecture/seminar. Long talk with Paul and Roxanne about relationships and Robert Johnson’s work. What are my 10 shadow questions in relationship… must ponder this…

Structure: 

Up at 7 am: yoga, meditation

830 Breakfast

9-12: Lectures

12: Lunch

2pm: Seminar

4pm: tea break with Roxanne and Paul

6pm: Book Launch Party

630: Dinner

10pm: Horoscope Writing

1230pm: Bed

Dreams: Foggy like the Swiss Alps… dreams, dreams please come back… I usually have very archetypal dreams

Day 4: Stirring in the Mud

“Becoming all of our being always begins in slime, in indeterminate hints, flashes, all mixed in with everything else, like a tiny plant issuing upward from a root in the mud.”-Ann Ulanov

Pisces Moon—My lunar return…

A terrible miscommunication via text sent me wanting to crawl back under the covers.

Enough reprimanding myself for mistakes.

Damn you, animus. 

Day 4: Scintilla The fiery center of the earth: both male and female.

I had dinner with my favorite Jungian Analyst: Ann Ulanov tonight and she says this about the destructive properties of a woman’s animus (unconscious male side of a woman’s psyche and bridge to her unconscious)…

Meet the Verbal Arsenal of the Animus: 

His favorite themes:

Telling you that you are:

Wrong

Unnoticed

Derivative

Fatally Flawed

Stupid

Everlastingly Alone

Damn you animus … for making me wrong; making it all my fault…telling me I can’t communicate….for attacking my throat chakra and giving me a horrible pain on the right side of my neck…. for trying to convince me to just shut-up and go back to bed to avoid making a fool out of myself. Enough of your insane critique.